PureInsight | August 8, 2014
[PureInsight.org] I am seventy-five years old and obtained the Fa in 1995. Before obtaining the Fa, I had many illnesses and I was on the verge of mental collapse. I almost could not take care of my life. I always had knitted brows and did not want to even see my family members or close friends. One day, my second eldest son brought home a copy of Zhuan Falun and told me, “This is a life-saving book. Practicing these exercises will make your body healthier.” I accepted the book without really believing his words and began practicing from time to time. That was how I entered cultivation. Due to my low enlightenment quality and lack of diligence, even though my body had become better, I still wasn’t energetic. I muddle headedly practiced like this for four years. The Fa I read did not really enter my mind, and practicing the exercises was like fishing for three days and drying the net for two. I was in a state of semi-cultivation. On July 20, 1999, my eldest son went to Beijing to clarify the truth and was illegally put in a brainwash camp when he returned. I did not have the slightest bit of courage to go see him. He was then put in a labor camp for a year and a half. My heart was always halfway in the air. I had a faster heart rate, and my fear became more serious. I was always unsettled. In addition, because my husband did not understand and instead watched over me seriously, my cultivation path was further restricted.
When my son returned from the labor camp, his state of firmly believing in Master and the Fa touched me. The notion of cultivating well reappeared in my heart. My son encouraged me to study the Fa and practice the exercises. He also took me out to clarify the truth and distribute truth clarification materials. Because I still had fear, he would walk ahead of me and distribute ten booklets while I remained at the rear and distributed one. Once when we went to distribute flyers to a mountain community, he encouraged me, “Look ahead, walk upwards and distribute flyers without any attachments. Sentient beings are waiting for you to save them!” After that, I became more courageous. When I walked down the mountain later, my entire body felt light. I very clearly felt Master’s reinforcement. After a period of Fa study, I understood why I had changed so slowly; I had not let go of a very fundamental attachment. After repeatedly reading Master’s article “Towards Consummation” published in 2000, I knew my fundamental attachment was cultivating with the goal of eliminating illness. Master said, “It isn’t wrong for human beings in this world to yearn with these attachments for beautiful dreams and wishes. But a cultivator definitely shouldn’t be that way. You may start on the path of Dafa with those thoughts, yet over the course of cultivation you need to regard yourself as a cultivator. During the course of cultivation, however, through reading the books, studying the Fa, and diligently making progress, you should clearly recognize what your thoughts were when you first came to Dafa.” Master is compassionate and did not let go of me even though I was not diligent. Thus, I resolved to be more diligent and eliminate this fundamental attachment. I joined the Fa study group and maintained going twice a week. Under fellow practitioners’ encouragement, I began to be stricter with myself, practicing the exercises, studying the Fa and sending forth righteous thoughts every day. If I did not understand something in Master’s Fa, I would bring it up at the Fa study group. If I could not pass a xinxing test, I was not afraid to bring it up. Once I understood the meaning behind righteous thoughts and righteous actions, I never again treated any physical interference as illness. Instead, I sent forth righteous thoughts and negated the Old Forces’ arrangements, continuing to practice the exercises and study the Fa. Just like this, my xinxing improved quickly and my mentality was refreshed. My former coworkers who saw me even said, “You’ve become more diligent.”
Just as I was becoming more diligent, my oldest son had a serious illness and left. My world fell apart. My fellow practitioners did not leave me. They all encouraged me, “Think about this situation from the Fa’s perspective.” At that moment, I very clearly realized that this was for me to let go of sentimentality! When family and friends came to comfort me, I did not listen to ordinary people’s comforting words. I understood that because I was a cultivator, I must listen to Master’s words, cultivate Dafa and put Dafa as the top priority. Everyone’s life is different, and he probably went to a better place. I had to cultivate to the end. Didn’t Master say before, “Cultivation is something you do right in the thick of tribulations. They’ll test whether you can sever your emotions and desires, and they’ll see if you can take them lightly” (Zhuan Falun). I let go of sentimentality, life and death, treated everything with a calm mind, overcame countless hardships and began to diligently do the three things again.
When my xinxing improved, my body felt light. I experienced that if I wanted to change myself, I had to be diligent in the Fa and quickly dissolve myself in the Fa. Along with some elderly fellow practitioners, I sent forth righteous thoughts in front of CCP organizations every day to eliminate evil no matter the weather. I distributed truth clarification materials every day. Not only did I have no fear whatsoever, but I could also distribute truth clarification materials with wisdom and do my best to convince people to quit the CCP. I truly experienced the meaning behind “traveling the four seas with a free and easy spirit” (Hong Yin Volume Two). Sometimes the Old Forces interfered with me, making my legs ache, hip ache or eyesight blurry. I never took any of that seriously and continued to send forth righteous thoughts, carrying truth clarification materials and CDs through my district’s streets, passing through farmers markets and parks. Every time I returned, I realized my body was as light as a swallow and my mindset was as open as an ocean.
I want to thank Master again for His compassionate salvation. I will be more diligent and cultivate to the end! When comparing myself with diligent fellow practitioners, I feel that I still have a long way to go. I wrote this to encourage myself, to validate Dafa’s strength and to thank Master for His compassion! Please point out anything inappropriate.
Translated from: http://www.zhengjian.org/node/131433
