PureInsight | September 9, 2006
[PureInsight.org] The first
moments that I recall from my current life here on Earth, happened in
my gradparents' house, while the whole family was at the table, I was
under the table and I said to myself:"This family is not mine." Then, I
see myself in my child bed, my head on the pillow, pinching my own
hand, trying to find out if all is a dream or it is real what was
happening to me. I was about two and a half or three and I was telling
myself that maybe I was adopted and my real parents would eventually
come and take me home or I was dreaming and after I woke up I wouldn't
be near the family from where I turned up and which I didn`t recognize
as being mine. "Of course, my real parents will come and take me home."
I grow up and forgot about that thing and I haven't told anyone about
it until, after more than 30 years, Master brought light to my mind and
helped me understand that my real mother is the one who gave birth to
my yuanshen: "In the course
of the Sixfold Path of Transmigration, the number of your mothers who
are human or non-human beings is countless. The number of your sons and
daughters is also numerous throughout your lifetimes. Who is your
mother? Who are your children? You will not know one another after you
pass away. You still have to pay the karmic debts you owe. Human beings
live in darkness and cannot abandon these things." (Zhuan Falun, Lecture 6, "Demonic Interference from one's Own Mind")
Growing up, during my adolescence I was wondered how it comes to be
that, in the same context, different people obtain different results.
For some of them everything was very easy, whilst for me, at least, I
had to work several times harder than others. I felt there was a
special category of people for whom everything was easier. Without
envy, I wished sometimes I were, too, in that category, but after a
while I gave up, telling myself that if this is the situation, I have
to accept it. After 20 years, Master helped me find the answer in Zhuan Falun, when, while teaching the Fa, he told us about "virtues" and "karma."
He says, "There is a transforming process between the white and the
black substances. After a person to person conflict has taken place,
there is a transforming process. One will get white substance, De (
Virtues), when doing something good, and will incur black substance,
karma, when doing something bad. Both substances can be carried
forward. Somebody may be wondering whether it is because one has done
something bad in the first half of his life. It is not all necessarily
so because a human has accumulated the karma not during one lifetime.
It is held in the world of cultivation that one's Yuanshen
(True Spirit) is immortal. If so, he might have had social activities
in his previous lives. One might have owed somebody, bullied somebody
or done some other bad things such as killing, etc., which would incur
such karma. Those substances can be accumulated in other spaces and are
always attached, and so can the white substance. They come not only
from this source. Another source is to be carried over from one's
family and ancestors. Old people in the past often talked about
accumulating virtues, and accumulating virtues from ancestors; this
person is losing his virtues and decreasing virtues. Those words are
quite right. Nowadays ordinary people would no longer listen to these
words. The young will not keep them in their minds when you talk about
losing virtues or being short of virtues. Actually, these words have
profound implications. They are not only a modern spiritual and mental
standard but also have a real material existence. Both substances can
be found in the human body" (Zhuan Falun, Lecture 4, "Transformation of Karma")
When I was about 20, I had a special experience: I entered clinical
death. It was not as a consequence of any accident. I simply saw my
body inert, lying down on the chairs from a underground station, with
many people around me trying to bring me back to life. I was watching
them from somewhere above and I also saw my body, from one side,
then from another side. I could see a long shaft of light that was
climbing to the sky and, at its end, a woman dressed in white was
waving at me as if greeting me. My state of mind was one that cannot be
easily described in words. It was like a liberation and a happiness,
but not the earthly happiness. I was to find it later, described by
Master in Zhuan Falun,
when he explained about the suffering that man has in this dimension,
because of the flesh body and human heart. I also know that I didn't
want to come back, though I saw all that people who were trying to
bring me to life. Finally somebody dared to soundly slap my face, which
woke me up. I remember the sadness I felt when I came back. At that
time I didn't know why they brought me back. Now I understand that
Master took care of me again, so I would not lose the chance to come in
Dafa.
"I have read a report in the newspaper saying, during the Tangshan
earthquake, many people died in it, but some were rescued. A special
social investigation was made of these people. They were asked how they
felt in the state of being dead. Contrary to everybody's expectations,
they all mentioned an extraordinary state under which they experienced
no sense of scare at the moment of death without exception. On the
contrary they suddenly felt a sense of relief and a sense of potential
excitement; some felt free from the bondage of the body, flying up
lightly and comfortably in the air, they even saw their own bodies;
some saw living beings in other spaces and others had been to some
places. They all talked about a sense of potential excitement of relief
without a feeling of suffering at the moment of death. This means that
our having the physical body is suffering. However, since we all come
out of mother's womb this way, we do not realize it is suffering" (Zhuan Falun - Lecture 9, "A Person Well Grounded in All Virtues")
Many times I asked myself: What is the Universe like? I was thinking
that beyond the planets I knew, beyond this Milky Way, there should be
something more. But where? What does it look like, that shell that I
thought puts an end to the universe? Even if I didn't reach even now
that wisdom to understand this mystery of the universe, at least Master
had the kindness to bring some light to my mind in this respect, too.
"Sakyamuni also put forward the three-thousand-chiliocosmos theory. He
said that in the Milky Way galaxy of our universe there were three
thousand planets on which living beings with material bodies like human
beings exist. He also said there were such three thousand chiliocosmos
in a grain of sand. A grain of sand is like a universe and there are
such beings of intelligence as us living in it. There are also such
planets, mountains and rivers in it. It sounds rather fantastic! If
this is true, just think about it, isn't there sand in the sand
mentioned? Aren't there three thousand chiliocosmos in each grain of
the sand there? Then, isn't there sand in each of those three thousand
chiliocosmos? And aren't there three thousand chiliocosmos in each
grain of the sand there again? Therefore, in the status of Tathagata
one cannot see its bottom" (Zhuan Falun - Lecture 2, "Issue of the Celestial Eye")
As an ordinary person, I could not stand seeing injustice. I was trying
to make justice, by any and all means, without taking into account
kindness and wisdom, but rather violently, being a sanguine character,
although that was not an acceptable excuse. Nevertheless, one day, as I
was crossing the street, right on zebra and right when it was green for
pedestrians, a car was heading towards me at a high speed. For the
moment, I was thinking it was better to stay there, so that when
the driver noticed me, he would have the chance to avoid me. But the
car got closer and closer and I didn't have time even to run out
of its way , the driver showing no sign of avoiding me. Then a thought
came in my mind: to jump on the car's bonnet so that not to have my
legs dragged under the wheels; at least to throw me aside. I did exacly
this way. Naturally, I was thrown on the asphalt. I got up, cleaning
the dust off my clothes, without a thought, or anger, or fear, while
the people around me, who witnessed the scene, started to tell me to go
with the driver to the police, to the hospital, etc. I only told them I
didn't want that and went forward. However, I was walking on the street
and, looking inside of me, I didn't recognize myself. I was wondering
how was it that I wasn't annoyed. I didn't scold the driver, even
though I had seen that he was talking at the phone and that is why he
didn't see the pedestrian. How was that I didn't claim my "rights" with
my palm, as I usually did. Nothing moved inside of me and, when I
reached home, I realized I didn't have a single scatch. Only later,
when I became Falun Dafa practitioner, was I to understand why it was
that way. Master explained to us: "Good or evil comes from a person's
spontaneous thought."
He said, "During my lecturing session in Taiyuan, there was a student
who was over 50 years old. She and her husband were crossing the road
on their way to the auditorium to attend my lecture when a car running
fast passed by them. The old woman was caught by the wing mirror of the
car. She was pushed along more than 10 meters before being thrown onto
the ground. The car did not stop until it had gone more than 20 meters.
The driver got out of the car and was cross with the lady: "Why weren't
you walking carefully?" Nowadays many people tend to shirk
responsibility when they meet with problems no matter whose fault it
is.
"The people in the car asked the woman how she felt and if she needed
to go to the hospital. At this, the driver changed his manner. He asked
the woman if she was all right, and offered to take her to the
hospital. The woman, who was a practitioner, rose from the ground and
said, "There's nothing wrong with me, you may go". Then she whisked
away the dust on her and left with her husband. When they came to
attend my lecture and told me what had happened, I felt happy because
our students' Xinxing had indeed improved. The woman told me that she
would have dealt with the occurrence differently if she had not learnt
Falun Dafa. Let us think about the event. The woman was in her 50's.
The car pushed her along so far and threw her heavily into the street.
Besides, she had retired enjoying no benefits. If such a thing had happened to an
ordinary person, she might have said that she was seriously injured,
and she might not have got up. If she had been sent to the hospital,
she might have caught this opportunity and stayed there as long as she
liked. But as a cultivator, the old lady didn't behave that way. We
believe that one mindfulness of a person determines the consequence of
an affair. Is it possible that an ordinary person at the age of 50
would not get hurt at all in such a situation? But the old lady did not
even scratch her skin! This is because she was right minded at that
moment. If she had said, "Oh, I feel terrible. Something is wrong with
this part or that part of my body...", then she might have really
broken her bones or got paralysed. She might have had to spend the rest
of her life in the hospital. In that case, would she feel better by
being paid a lot of money? The people watching the accident wondered
why the old woman did not take advantage of the mishap to squeeze some
money from the driver. We know that moral standards have been distorted
today. The driver was wrong for speeding. But did he knock the woman
down intentionally? Certainly not. However, even the bystanders think
it unfair that she did not ask the driver for money as compensation.
Many people do not know what is right and what is wrong. If you tell
someone that he is doing bad, he will not believe you. Because changes
have taken place in the moral standard of mankind. Some people put
profit-making first. There is nothing that they dare not do for the
sake of money. And it has even been taken as the motto by some people
that "Heaven destroys those who do not look out for themselves" (Zhuan Falun, Lecture 4, "Upgrading Xinxing")
I also remember that I used to go quite often to church, to pray...but
many times, after finishing the prayer, I left there crying. It seemed
to me that nobody was there to hear our prayers, that, there, in
the church, nobody took care of people. I was to find out from Master
the fact that "in this Dharma-ending Period even the monks in the
temple would find it difficult to save themselves, not to mention
saving others".
He mentioned that, "Sakyamuni said that in the Period of Decline even
the monks in the temple would find it difficult to save themselves, not
to mention lay Buddhists, whom nobody is actually taking care of.
Though you have formally become a disciple to a master, the so-called
master is also a cultivator. If he does not get down to genuine
cultivation, he will also achieve nothing. Nobody can ascend if he does
not cultivate his heart. Conversion is a ceremony for an ordinary
person. Will your conversion to Buddhism make you a person belonging to
the Buddha School? And then, the Buddha will take care of you? There is
no such thing. Even if you kowtow every day with your forehead grazed
and burn incense bundle after bundle, it is still of no use. You have
to cultivate your heart in a real and earnest way. Up till to the
Period of Decline, a great change has already taken place in the
universe. Even the places where people practise their religious beliefs
have gone bad. Those who possess supernormal capabilities (including
monks) have also found such a situation. At present only I myself in
the whole world am teaching the Orthodox Law in public. I have done
something never done by anyone before, and opened such a large door
during the Period of Decline. This, in fact, is a chance that does not
occur once in a thousand years or even in ten thousand years. However,
it still depends on you yourself whether you can be saved or, to put it
another way, whether you are able to cultivate. What I say is a great
cosmic Law." (Zhuan Falun, Lecture 3, " Be Constant in a Single Cultivation System "
It often happened to me that, after suffering something, after crying,
I took refuge in a world about which I didn't talk with anyone. It was
enough to close my eyes and "watch." I could see scenes in black and
white with people who were not always from contemporary society, but
who were moving and had activities. It was as if I was watching a film.
I have never told anyone about this thing for fear I should be
considered "crazy." Anyway, it seemed to be something fantastic to stay
shut-eyed and see things that you could not have seen with open eyes. I
didn't know what all that meant, but they fascinated me somehow. When I
first read China Falun Gong, Master explained this "miracle," too, when he talked about "The Issue of the Tianmu".
He said, "Someone may see another scene. He would feel that he is
running not along a tunnel but along an endless broad road on either
side of which there are mountains, rivers, and cities. He just keeps
running outward. It may sound fantastic. I still remember a qigong
master's words. He said that in a pore in the human body there was a
city in which the trains and cars were running. Other people were much
surprised at his words and were incredulous. As you know, a substance
is composed of molecules, atoms, and protons in its microcosmic state.
In the end, you may keep investigating downward like this. If you can
see a plane, not a dot, in each dimension, that is, if you can see the
plane of molecules, or that of atoms, or that of protons, or that of
nuclei, you will see the existing forms of different spaces. Any
object, including the human body, coexists with and is open into the
spatial planes of the cosmic space at the same time. When contemporary
physics studies the particles of matter, it only studies a single
particle by analyzing and fissioning it. It studies its component parts
after its nuclear fission. If we had such an instrument through which
we could see the whole manifestation of all atomic composition or
molecular composition existing in this plane, if we could see this
picture, we would break through this space and see the true existence
of other spaces" (Zhuan Falun, Lecture 2, "Issue of the Celestial Eye")
I remember that when I was 14, I had a dream, if I can call it dream. I
was in front of a huge throne of stone, where, I knew inside of me, the
Lord stayed. I didn't dare to look at His face, I only see that He was
huge, and from where I was I only saw His feet. And, as I was sitting
in front of Him, on something like a carpet that was leading to him, I
heard Him say: "Go and tell people to be good as I will come back, I
will return to them." I woke up and I didn't know what to do, where to
go, what to say.
After 20 years, indeed, reading Dafa brought by Shifu, I understood
that the Lord came back to people to help them, laying down to them "A
ladder to Heaven", giving them this chance to get out of this maze of
the ordinary human society.
Thank you, Shifu, for the chance given and the honnour offered to be a
Dafa disciple in the Fa-Rectification period. Thank you, Shifu, for the
Light that you brought to our minds and hearts.
