How a “Tigress” Turned into a Good Wife and a Kind Mother

Fazi, a Dafa disciple in Hubei

PureInsight | July 20, 2014

[PureInsight.org] When I was young, I was a sickly child. Brought up by indulgent parents, I was spoilt and my mouth was always open for food. Luckily, my grandparents believed in Buddha and took my sister and me frequently to temples where we worshiped Buddha. Though rebellious in my childhood, I was quite obedient when we visited the temples, I would kowtow to the Buddha statue with great respect. My sister, who went with me, stubbornly refused to kowtow to the Buddha statue. When returning home she would complain to my mother, “Grandpa asked me to kowtow to a mud statue, I won’t do it.”

When I grew older and got a job, my colleagues called me Lin Daiyu (a sickly figure in an ancient Chinese novel). At that time, I was often hospitalized, given injections and underwent surgery. One after another, I contracted hyperthyroidism, appendicitis, nephritis, phthisis, cervical spondylitis, lumbar spondylitis, insomnia, fibroid, ovarian cysts, etc. After marriage and labor, my health worsened, by the time I was in my 30’s, I was lying in bed unable to go to work. My salary was stopped by the company I was working for.

In desperation, I went to the hospital every day to see specialists; I took Western medicine, Chinese medicine and tonics. After several years of treatment, I didn’t feel any better, instead more diseases appeared. With my deteriorating health, my temperament got worse. Though I didn’t fight with or curse other people I often lost control of my emotions at home, shouting loudly to vent my frustration and anxiety. After a while, each time I got angry, my husband would say that I was a tigress showing off my power, and often called me “tigress” in front of my child. I deeply resented this name, but had no way of dealing with it. At that time of my life, I had lost all hope. I was beginning to prefer death instead of life.

Soon, spring of 1999 came around and I came across a group of people in a park doing morning exercises. They sat on the ground with beautiful music playing in the background. Their eyes were slightly closed; they looked calm, amiable and attractive. I spontaneously walked up and asked what kind of exercise they were doing. The answer was Falun Gong (also called Falun Dafa). On hearing that it was a Buddhist school exercise, I said I would like to learn. The instructor (who was a volunteer) saw that I was very weak, so he took out a book from his pocket and gave it to me. I saw the title of the book was ‘Zhuan Falun’. Without much discussion, the instructor told me to go back home and read this book. He said, “If you can achieve what is required in the book, then you can come to learn.” I was puzzled. It was the first time I heard that learning an exercise required reading a book first. Unable to hold myself back when I got home, I opened Zhuan Falun.

The moment I saw Master’s Buddha image in the book, I was immediately struck by an indescribable feeling, like a long lost close relative had finally found me, though we had never met before. Even stranger, when I was reading the book, my tears would not stop. Every sentence in the book struck me deep in my heart. I kissed the book again and again after reading it. I have read a lot of books in my life, but I had never read such a good book as this. Weeping while reading, diarrhea struck in the afternoon. I knew roughly from Zhuan Falun that Master had already started cleansing my body. Usually, after several bouts of diarrhea I would be feeble and very weak, but not this time; the more diarrhea, the more energetic I became. I continually read the book for three days. What I could remember from reading the book at that time was the requirement for disciples to not hit back when attacked, to not talk back when insulted, to strive to be a good person, not to kill etc. After reading the book, I went and found the practice site coordinator and asked to learn the exercises.

After that, I learned to strictly control myself. I did not get angry at my family members, and measured every word and action according to the requirements of “Truth-Compassion-Tolerance”. Every day, I studied the Fa and delighted in doing the exercises. I lived steadily and surely, I even smiled in my dreams. The ancients have a saying, “Having heard the Dao in the morning, one can die in the evening.” I had obtained the Fa in the most desperate time of my life. How lucky I was, I was the happiest person in the world! From studying the Fa and doing the exercises, all my diseases vanished without a trace in a short period of time. My body was as light as a feather. I felt clean and youthful.

Fifteen years have passed since I started cultivation and I’ve never taken one pill. Half a year after I first read Zhuan Falun and learnt the exercises, I went back to work, my colleagues all marveled that I looked younger and that my bad temper had disappeared. I thought about others first when doing anything. I didn’t compete or fight for power or gain, I treated people with kindness. My colleagues all said, “Is Falun Gong good or bad? Just look at the great change in her and you can tell.” I did my work with cautiousness and conscientiousness, respecting my superiors and helping my colleagues. When I was not at work, I washed the clothes, cooked meals, and took care of my old mother and my son. My husband worked part time in another region, because of unemployment where we lived. He could only come home on New Year’s Day or some festivals. I no longer complained or haggled over everything and my husband no longer called me “Tigress.” Dafa requires us to unconditionally look within for our shortcomings and to think of others first when doing things. My husband was very moved after seeing the great changes in me and said that he would practice Falun Gong later on.

A few years ago, our residential property was taken from us forcefully by the Chinese Communist Party. My husband said he had no time to come back and help. I worked during the day and took care of my mother and son at night; I spent a lot of time looking for cheap property to buy and painstakingly supported the whole family in silence. Even so, I still went out to tell people the truth about the CCP’s persecution of Falun Gong and asked them not to be fooled by the CCP’s lies and deceit. In addition, I had to face illegal harassment from the evil people from the 610 office (Chinese ‘Gestapo’). Dealing with these things would have been unbearable for me before I started practicing Falun Dafa, at that time I had to ask my husband to get water for me when I wanted to drink. I would only speak, but never had the energy to gesture with my hands. I would get angry at little frustrations. After beginning cultivation however, I’m not irritable anymore and I restrain myself at every moment with “Truth-Compassion-Tolerance”. When my husband got angry I would tolerate it, I never quarreled with him after learning Falun Gong.

One day, my husband didn’t return home until late. The day after, I found a strange phone message asking him to go out. In a sudden rage, I felt very wronged and lost. I felt that I had given everything I had for our family. I was good in every respect, and earned a higher income than my husband. After being unemployed for many years, my husband still done this dirty thing, it was hard to take. I was very angry. After a while, I calmed down and looked within and saw that I had an attachment of envy, a postnatal formed notion of ‘struggle’ and that I had developed a grudge against my husband. I restrained my anger and thought instead about my husband’s hard work and loneliness, working away from home. I thought more about his benevolence and virtues. I then had another look at myself and realized that I had only been taking care of my mother and young son, but had neglected my husband because of being too busy.

The next day, I told my husband that he needed to look after his health better when working away from home, don’t associate with bad people, and don’t compromise his integrity during the later years of his life. If I were not cultivating, I definitely would not have let the matter rest so easily. It was the profound and extensive principles of the great law - Dafa that has remolded me, it was the compassionate and great Master who scooped me up from hell, washed me clean and metamorphosed me from being a tigress to a good wife and a kind mother.

Now that I have retired, my son has obtained his postgraduate degree and got himself a good job. My mother is now in her 90’s and can take care of herself. My husband is also about to retire. I thank Master and Dafa, I would like to tell everyone, “Falun Dafa is good; Zhen Shan Ren is good”.

Translated from http://zhengjian.org/node/129668

 

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