PureInsight | December 3, 2007
[PureInsight.org] During my
cultivation there has been a whole gamut of feelings, including
happiness, anger, grief, and joy. There have been laughter and tears,
as well as danger and wonder. However, no matter what I encountered I
treated it all as good, since we are the ones who are on the path
toward Godhood.
1. Letting Go of Fear
I had a very strong sense of fear and I almost went out of my mind
because of it. After coming back to Falun Dafa I knew from the bottom
of my heart that Dafa was good and should be cherished. I also knew of
Teacher's merciful and arduous salvation. I was, therefore, determined
to cultivate Falun Dafa through to the end, but I just could not let go
of my fear. At the very beginning I was afraid that other people might
know that I practiced Falun Gong. I hid the Falun Dafa books and
practiced the exercises in secrecy. In doing Dafa work I was scared and
felt like my heart was in my mouth. Whenever someone knocked on the
door or the telephone rang I would instantly be nervous. If I saw the
police or a police car in the street I would also feel terrified.
When I went to hand out the truth-clarification material for the very
first time I was tailed but I got rid of him with righteous thoughts.
On returning home, I was trembling. Since I had this strong mentality
of fear I would often have some unrighteous thoughts after coming back
from a truth-clarification trip. It eventually led to demonic
interference from my own mind which went according to my thoughts. As a
result, it caused a lot of trouble. I lost my job, caused great harm to
my family and created obstacles to the saving of the people around me.
I felt very bad.
My fellow practitioners encouraged me to stand up again after the fall.
In order to make up for the losses and reduce them to clarify the truth
so as to save more sentient beings, I repeatedly talked to leaders at
various levels in my work unit about the truth of the persecution. I
also clarified the truth and exposed the crimes of the Communist Party
to whomever I met. Though I could not make up the losses, I found that
my fear mentality was getting to be less pronounced and I was able to
do Dafa work righteously and nobly. At the same time, my family
environment also changed for the better.
When I read Teacher's new article "Pass the Deadly Test," I realized
that we must openly expose the crimes of the persecution of the
practitioners of Falun Dafa by the CCP to help the Chinese people and
the people in the rest of world know the evil nature of the CCP. Only
by doing so people would leave the CCP, cast it aside, withdraw from
it, and lose their interest in it. Only by doing this would people
learn the truth and be saved. Therefore, I wrote articles about how the
CCP had persecuted me and compiled them into pamphlets. Then I mailed
or handed them out to people in an attempt to help them learn the
truth. My fear mentality was getting less and less, my righteous
thoughts grew stronger with each passing day, and my cultivation
environment was also improving.
When the National People' s Congress and the National Political
Consultative Conference were in session in Beijing, my fear mentality
recurred and the unrighteous thoughts returned. All this made me
panic-stricken. However, I had learned a lesson in the past so I tried
not to be led by others but actively did away with the fear mentality
and eliminated the evil factors. During the two conferences I studied
the Fa in the morning and then sent forth righteous thoughts. In the
afternoon I went to the vicinity of Tiananmen Square to send forth
righteous thoughts. When I got to Tiananmen Square, I saw armed
policemen, plainclothes policemen, security guards and law officers
from the Beijing Municipal Law-Enforcing Bureau of the City
Comprehensive Administration everywhere. The security was very tight
and it was ghastly horrible.
On the first day, I did not dare go into the square and only sent forth
righteous thoughts at the Tiananmen Square bus station. On the second
day, I went with a stream of people from the southern side to the
northern side of the Square, but the fear mentality was still there. On
the third day, I had a much calmer mind. I went with a stream of people
to go around the Square. On the forth day, the Square was under a
curfew so I went to a nearby Kentucky restaurant to buy something to
eat. I located a seat, sat down and sent forth the most powerful
righteous thoughts. The huge character of " mie"
(eliminate) landed on the venue of the two conferences and I saw the
evil forces turned into insects and then melted into liquid. I sent
righteous thoughts for a good two hours and felt wonderful. On the
fifth day, I went there again. Compared to the previous days I found
that I was in a much better state and in high spirits. I walked
steadily in the square with my head high. I shouted repeatedly in a
very low voice while walking "Falun Dafa is good! Zhen Shan Ren
(Truthfulness, Compassion and Tolerance) is good! Clear Teacher's good
name!"
At that time I felt I was gigantic and sacred. I also felt light and
happy. My fear mentality had been swept away altogether. On the sixth
day, I went to the Square again to send forth righteous thoughts. That
day I felt very relaxed. Although there were a lot of armed police,
plainclothes policemen, and security guards strolling nearby, I felt as
if there were no one else present. I sent forth the righteous thoughts
in a calm state. I saw a lot of tourists sit in various places and,
finally, I found a spot myself and sat down. A policeman came towards
me as soon as I sat down. I did not have any fear at all and kept
sending forth righteous thoughts. He simply went past me. Thereafter, I
went to Tiananmen Square many times to send forth righteous thoughts.
My fear was decreasing and my righteous thoughts were getting stronger.
When my mindset was good it was a lot easier to do truth clarification.
Studying and memorizing the Fa made it possible for me to pay great
attention to sending forth righteous thoughts. As a result, my
righteous thoughts were getting stronger and stronger and the concepts
from the old cosmos were fewer and fewer. After reading the two books,
the "Nine Commentaries on the Communist Party" and "Disintegrating the
Party Culture," I really saw through to the true nature of the Chinese
Communist Party, which is made up of a scoundrel gang that is guilty of
unpardonable evil. Therefore, my thoughts broke the shackles of the old
concepts and my heart was a lot purer than before. However, whenever I
lowered the standards for myself or slackened in my cultivation or
failed to pay attention to sending forth righteous thoughts, the evil
forces would come back instantly and would take advantage of my
loopholes. They would make me feel uncomfortable or have conflicts at
home or come across interference from the old forces. When we encounter
things like that we must be alert and look inside ourselves to find our
attachments. Most likely, it will be a result of having too little Fa
study and, therefore, the human attachments will reemerge. If there is
no righteous thought there will be no righteous action and, therefore,
the evil forces will take advantage of the loopholes. At times like
that I strengthen my Fa study and send forth righteous thoughts.
Usually the bad symptoms will disappear. Whenever I came across
interference I was able to break the arrangements of the old forces and
totally negate them. When you can do that, then the interference will
mean nothing.
On one occasion there was some kind of construction going on outside my
window. Every day several construction workers hired from other places
made so much noise. At the beginning I thought it was interference but,
later, I thought, "Are they here to learn the truth?" Therefore, I
clarified the facts with them and helped them to do the three
withdrawals (withdrawing from the Chinese Communist Party, the Youth
League and the Young Pioneers.) Ever since then my home has been quiet
again.
I went to Tiananmen Square, Zhongnanhai (the headquarters of the CCP),
the Public Security Ministry and the detention centers. The more I
went, the less fear I had, and the stronger the righteous thoughts. I
learned that when we run into conflicts or interference or persecution,
we must look inside ourselves and make a concerted effort to let go of
our attachments. Without attachments the evil forces have nothing to
take advantage of. Thus it can not persecute us.
2. Cleansing Myself
With the reduction of the evil factors, my fear mentality has been
improved, the psychological pressure reduced, and the environment has
become more relaxed. However, in the process there were all sorts of
bad thoughts, bad concepts and bad conduct on my part. The attachments
that I thought I had let go pretty well reemerged. These include
seeking ease and comfort, trying to save myself trouble, seeking fame
and gain, being greedy for food, being excessively fond of sleep, being
lazy and relying on others. The most dreadful attachment was the
attachment of using Dafa to achieve my own gains. These attachments
directly affected me in doing the three things Teacher requested us to
do. Although I was doing the three things it became a mere formality
and could not reach the desired goal. For example, in studying the Fa I
failed to concentrate my mind, in sending forth righteous thoughts I
could not keep myself in a calm state, and in clarifying the truth I
failed to put in enough effort. When I studied the Fa, my eyes were on
the book but my mind was thinking something else.
Since I did not study the Fa solidly I had not reached the standard of
a practitioner. In a period of time, the evil forces adopted another
method to persecute me. The manifestation was symptoms of sickness,
including leg aches, backaches, headaches and sleepiness. Thereafter, I
studied the Fa a lot and, one day, I suddenly thought that Teacher had
already provided us with the best thing we could find in the world so
why on earth should I still hold on to rubbish? Teacher provided us
this great Fa, a ladder to heaven. Teacher also provided us the number
one title in the universe "Fa rectification period Dafa Disciple." The
Falun and numerous energy mechanisms Teacher has provided us are
priceless and can not be gained even through several lives of
cultivation. Teacher has provided us the best of everything so how
could we not to cultivate to the best of our ability and not cherish
this most precious time? Why should I still hold on to this rubbish
from the human world?
Teacher said,
"Did you know that in order to save you the Buddha once begged for food
among everyday people? Today, I once again make the door wide open, and
teach this Dafa[1] to save you. I have never felt bitter for the
numerous hardships I have suffered. Then what do you have that still
can't be abandoned? Can you bring to heaven the things deep down inside
that you cannot let go of?" ("True Cultivation" from Essentials for Further Advancement)
Reflecting on this point, I was in tears. Therefore, I got on my knees
in front of Teacher's portrait to kowtow to him and kept reminding
myself that I would never live up to Teacher's merciful and arduous
salvation. I was determined to reach consummation. In the days to come
whenever human attachments occurred when I was studying the Fa or doing
the exercises I would think how I wanted to go to the world arranged by
Teacher. I don't want the everyday people's stuff which is too filthy.
Gradually my attachments reduced greatly and my heart became purer. As
a result I am able to do the three things better.
I was very much moved when I saw some practitioners memorize the Fa.
Some were able to recite three lectures a day and others would write
from memory after they finished memorizing it. I spent more time and
effort in memorizing the Fa. I was constantly in the Fa including the
time when I was having meals, sleeping or walking. I achieved very good
results whether I was doing the exercises, sending forth the righteous
thoughts or clarifying the truth. Only by cleansing ourselves can we
save more sentient beings. Currently, practitioners have a huge
responsibility and are undertaking a great historical mission.
Therefore I must go all out and plunge myself into saving sentient
beings.
3. Saving Sentient Beings with Compassion
At the final stage of the Fa-rectification we must use all
opportunities to rectify the Fa and save sentient beings. Time is
pressing. There are still huge numbers of sentient beings who haven't
been saved. I am really worried. However, I have always found that
there is not enough time. Usually I do this but have no time to do
that. In clarifying the truth I act according to circumstances. I have
adopted various methods such as talking, sending messages, putting up
posters and other materials, as well as mailing. In order to produce
more and better truth-clarification materials I set my printer to the
continuous paper feeding mode and bought a CD/DVD burner. In choosing
the consumables I always buy the quality ones so I can try my best to
produce much nicer truth-clarification materials. These eye catching
materials will attract whomever has his eye on them. Usually I ride my
bike to go to residential areas to hand out and put up he
truth-clarification materials after sending forth righteous thoughts in
the morning and in the evening. I thought these time slots were better.
Since it is rush hour and people come and go frequently, I will not
attract other people's attention when I go there. On the other hand,
people will pick up the truth-clarification materials sooner. It will
be safer for me as well. With a compassionate and peaceful mind I
normally finish in a very short period of time. Each time I feel that I
did not bring enough materials with me. On my way back I go shopping
using the paper bills with the truth-clarification information on them.
I memorize Zhuan Falun
from early morning until noon, the time for righteous thoughts. After
the righteous thoughts I begin to process the truth-clarification
materials. If there are visitors at home I would dress well and bring
some truth-clarification materials to clarify the truth in public
places face to face. This happens at public bus stations, inside the
market or even strolling on the street. Sometimes, when I am riding a
bike I am still able to clarify the truth to the bicycle rider next to
me. I usually chat about some family chores first and then switch to
social problems. Eventually I would tell them that the "Tiananmen
Square Immolation Incident" was staged and persuade them to chant
silently "Falun Dafa is good!" and "Truthfulness, Compassion and
Tolerance are good!" since the practice will bring them good fortune.
In this way many people have withdrawn from the Chinese Communist Party
and its subordinate organizations. Even though some people were
unwilling to do the three withdrawals at that moment, they have at
least learned the truth of the persecution of Falun Gong. When we use
the wisdom Teacher has opened up for us to clarify the truth, it will
go very naturally, smoothly and harmoniously.
I often go to parks to clarify the truth. Usually I dress well and take
a camera with me. I chat naturally and casually with the people in the
park. While strolling I tell them the truth of the persecution of Falun
Gong. In clarifying the truth in parks I have more time to explain even
more clearly to those people who have predestined relationships.
Sometimes I bump into fellow practitioners. One day I met a fellow
practitioner who came from another part of the country. She had not
received Teacher's recent articles and "Clearwisdom Weekly" for quite a
long period of time. Therefore, she was feeling very low and even had
symptoms of sickness karma. When I clarified the facts to her we
recognized each other. She cried owing to her excitement. She said it
was arranged by Teacher and Teacher did not let her lag behind. From
that day onwards she was able to read "Clearwisdom Weekly" again and
now she is doing the three things very well. What's more, I also come
across former practitioners. I always encourage them to come back and
tell them Teacher is waiting for them.
With the advance of the current of the Fa rectification the evil
factors have been eliminated and the control of the worldly people by
the old forces is getting weaker and weaker. Therefore, it's becoming a
lot easier to clarify the facts to people now. The key point is whether
we are able to let go of ourselves, our selfishness, our old concepts,
and the CCP's evil party culture. If we only have one thought, the
thought to save more sentient beings, then we are able to save more
people. One day when I went to a park to clarify the facts, the park
management was knocking down a flowerbed in front of the gate. Many
people were there to pick up flowers. I went over and picked up flowers
while clarifying the truth to them. In two hours more than 10 people
withdrew from the CCP and its subordinate organizations. One man came
back to me after quitting the CCP. He asked what Buddha Fa I was
learning. I told him what I learned is Falun Dafa, cultivating the
principle of "Truthfulness, Compassion and Forbearance." I also told
him that I am now free of illnesses thanks to the practice of Falun
Dafa. What's more, my whole family has benefited from my practicing
Falun Dafa. I told him both my husband and my child were outstanding in
many aspects. He listened quietly and finally said he came from a place
pretty far from the park. Since he forgot to bring the monthly park
ticket with him he could not go into the park. Wasn't it obvious that
he came to look for and listen to the truth? Wasn't it arranged by
Teacher?
In the evening I listen to Teacher's Fa lecture with my son for about
an hour. When he is doing the sitting meditation I am in his company.
After the sitting meditation it is time to send forth righteous
thoughts. We go to bed after the righteous thoughts. We do the first
four sets of exercises in the early morning. Though my son was
preparing for the university entrance exam and time was very tight, he
would study the Fa no matter how busy he was. It's our duty to help the
young practitioners. He and I learned the Fa together. At the time he
was only 11. He grew up under the Buddha's Light. Dafa opened up his
wisdom and he had prominent achievements in Chinese traditional music
instruments. What he achieved was under Teacher's compassionate care.
Without Teacher's help he could not have achieved such outstanding
marks. I would like to take this opportunity to express our gratitude
to our Venerable Teacher.
We must cherish Teacher's merciful and arduous salvation, cherish this
most precious time of all the ages, cherish our own sacrifices and the
sufferings that our families, relatives and friends have faced, as well
as cherishing the support of the overseas practitioners in fulfilling
the practitioners' historical mission.
Translated from:
http://minghui.org/mh/articles/2007/11/22/166996.html
